Defining.... Something

There's an article about female directors in the San Jose Mercury News this week.

I tend to get uncomfortable with this kind of thing. Uncomfortable on more than one level, of course; there's always the level of, well, how much does this really tell you, no need to be a feminazi (which is such a horrible word), judge films by their merits, etc. And the level of ... that's it? Female movie directors are only 7%? Really? Really really? Because gross.

It's about film, and I don't know whether it's the same in theater, which is the area I'm more interested in directing. I imagine (or hope) that it's not, but it's annoying to me that that will always be in the background for me, almost regardless of what I end up doing. And you try not to give it too much attention, because then you drive yourself crazy, but you can't quite just ignore it either.

It's something that's sort of been bouncing around in my head over the last year or so; something I had to come to terms with at SJC (because what's rarer than a female director? A female philosopher, of course!), but coming to terms with it in the real world is something else again.

Not that I've faced any direct bigotry in any theater stuff I've done before, at least none that I knew of. And I feel really lucky in the people I'm working with now, I have so many role models there, many many of whom are women, strong and powerful and intelligent and interesting ones, and it is absolutely amazing to go in every day and just ... soak stuff up, you know. Sit and watch and feel the brain expanding, and occasionally mutter a suggestion. So it's not something that I'm facing, or overcoming, or anything really, in my day to day life. More something that is ... nibbling, I guess. At the back.

I didn't mean to ramble. This stuff has been on my mind for awhile, and certain things in the article crystalized certain things in my thinking. Clearly, not enough that I actually make any sense, though. I'll come to an answer about it sooner or later.